Indubitably

Here is a handy guide for determining how drunk you are. If anything, it makes me realize that I need to start incorporating bigger words into my drunk vocabulary. I don't think I've ever attempted to say any of those words whilst drunk. I choke on much smaller. (Haha Dirty. So sorry. I get thrills out of saying risque things like this... assaulting your unassuming minds.)

LIfE adVICE

We could all use a little life advice from time to time. Lord knows I need it every day. And what better way to receive said advice than in comic form. It's like a spoon full of sugar with your medicine, or better yet, Flinstones vitamin chewables. I'd never complain about taking medicine/ life advice if it was coated in sweetness. Also, these comics feature a lot of small clouds or something. I interpret them as farts. Lots of farts everywhere. I don't know how this could get any better! Sweet farts, everyone!

Hrrrrry Pttrrrr MekUp Tutrrrrlll.

In celebration for the much anticipated HP7 pt 2 movie bonanza craziness that awaits us shortly, I am gifting you with a tutorial. A Hagrid How-To! GET EXCITED! Everyone loves Hagrid. Just look at what the fans are saying. The common man, the you, the me. Here we have representation of Hagrid that recalls Gaston a la Disney's Beauty and the Beast. I expect this Hagrid to bust out into song about his chest hairs any minute now. Strong. Manly. Hagrid.

Clearly, it's decided by almost everybody that Hagrid is the next Johnny Depp, aka a SEX SYMBOL! Move over, Brad Pitt!  So, fellas, why not dress like him? He's all women talk/ fantasize about. It's right there in the Cosmopolitan research. Trust me, I read it for you!


Hope you enjoyed that as much as I did. Same girl who did the Avatar Make Up Tutorial, which had me thoroughly entertained for months.

Yesterday's Man

For whatever reason, it turns out that the majority of my known readers are male. You all know who you are! I haven't exactly pegged down why this is. Perhaps I just like things that typical males like... except for girls, sports, cars, camping, Chuck Norris, sexy anime, the "Stars"--both Trek and Wars, the new My Little Pony, deer antlers, and biking. Those are some key man things I just don't get. 

I realize that it now sounds as if I'm not qualified to give my Sunday sermon to you guys. "She just doesn't understand us at all. And it's Friday." - Men, everywhere.

Okay, okay, I understand how you could feel this way. But that's life. Get over it. Sometimes it just so happens that you find yourself getting advice from the absolute worst source ever. And you take the advice. And life generally works out okay. Besides, you can't fire me because I already quit!

But, like I was saying before I dug myself into hole and put in my two weeks notice, these words are being read by male eyes--dreamy male eyes. So, here's some advice and slang for manly men!