Maybe they actually DO know and thing or two about the history that they shamelessly wrap their lanky bodies in. Maybe they were actually part of the history they fain nostalgia for.
Maybe they time travel.
Don't look at me like I'm crazy. Maybe their snobbery is actually the secret to keeping this whole time travel thing under wraps.
 | |||||||||
| Famed "Time Traveling Hipster" Photo. Do you see him? This is why God gave you eyes! |
The time machine probably runs on a complex formula comprised of: cigarette butts, mustache wax, and the chemical compounds found in the plastic frames of the fake glasses that turn normal faces into hipster faces.
[Ed. note: I am a hipster wolf in sheep's clothing (picture me in a furries costume at a "Furmeet" in the woods/ motel 6--that is, a hipster furries costume that is like super tight, maybe ripped, old looking like vintage but I probably bought it at Urban Outfitters, androgynous, oh yeah with ipod headphones coming out of my wolfy ears). If that's too graphic, let me put it this way: hating hipsters makes you the ultimate hipster. Scientifically proven.]
Bravo. "Hipster wolf in sheep's clothing"--genius. But, nothing about fixies in a blog about hipsterology? Close but no cigar.
ReplyDelete